Day 193 – I’m Not Sorry

8 HUGS, 4 children, 4 adults (1 husband, 2 neighborhood friends, 1 parking lot attendant at New Hope Valley Railway)

I am in self help mode right now and I can’t help myself. I wanted so badly to write something light and fun tonight because that is the kind of mood I am in, but this post in my head is screaming to get out. And, after reading it you will realize that my first sentence kind of proves my point.

I find myself making excuses and apologizing for being me. Numerous times when hugging my neighbors I will apologize for having…bad breath, a sweaty back, no deodorant, etc. I have never noticed someone else’s bad breath, sweaty back or lack of deodorant yet I feel the need to announce my shortcomings and apologize for them before someone else notices them. Why? Does it make me feel in control of my shortcomings? Do I think that self-deprecating is more endearing? If so, I really need to change my way of thinking. These are not endearing qualities. If anything I could see them bordering on annoying. That is not the way I want to be. I want others to look at me as a confident self assured woman that they want to hug. Not a semi confident girl that they feel obligated to hug.

Constant apologizing forces me in to a perpetual sense of failure. I didn’t brush my teeth before seeing you? Sorry neighbor, I failed. I can’t find your car keys? Sorry hubby, I failed. I didn’t hug anyone today for my blog? Sorry readers, I failed. Not one of these things are a failure on my part, yet apologizing for them makes it so. I am going to rise above this feeling of failure and not apologize. I am in a self help mode and you are going to like it or you’re not. Either way I do not apologize. It is me and I am a success.

Please accept this blog as my virtual hug to you.

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6 thoughts on “Day 193 – I’m Not Sorry

  1. I have never felt OBLIGATED to HUG you , if I did not WAnt to hug you I would nOT have !!!! I hug you because I know you and love you for the friend that you are to me:)I can not speak for others but that is my point of view. Have you gotten any negative feedback from others??? I think most (if they had an issue)would say ” I don’t want to hug you> ” which you may get from strangers but when you are opening yourself up to the world expect everything… just go with the flow you will get negative and positive… I like you sweaty and stinky , I like you more fresh and nice smelling…………… but I ‘ll take what I can get. 🙂

    • Thank you Sharon. I really haven’t gotten any negative feedback I am just learning to let go of what people might think. I am glad that you like me even when I am sweaty and stinky because I think we see each other more often that way than not. lol

  2. I’m with Sharon…I’ve never felt obligated to hug you. Your hugs are real hugs and that’s what everyone looks forward to. If they don’t hug you then they are missing out! 🙂

  3. You are you and that is a beautiful thing!!!!!!!!!! You are a beautiful and wonderful person no matter how you smell or look. Everyone who is anyone can certainly see that about you and love you for that. You should never have to apologize for being you. We all love the Melinda we know where they be smelly or not………..
    {{{HUGS}}}
    Love and miss you

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