Day 265 – Emotional Mask

3 HUGS, 2 children, 1 husband

Soooo…how is everyone’s year going? Are your resolutions being upheld so far? I didn’t necessarily make any resolutions but I did decide that I would like to be more present in each moment. (Technically I suppose that is a resolution if you really want to look at it that way.) In the past I have confused this with always being happy. The more present I am in each moment the happier I would be. It turns out it is not an automatic thing. As long as I am present in the moment I can make the choice to be happy. But, it also means that I will have to acknowledge and accept how I am feeling before I can make the choice to be happy. (have I lost you yet?)

I am very guilty of masking my emotions. If I pretend that I am not angry or sad, then I am not. That has not worked well for me because when I least expect it, these feelings bubble to the surface and then I am crying hysterically for no good reason. I am learning that being present in the moment means to acknowledge and accept that I am angry or sad. I need to feel these emotions to their fullest extent and then practice releasing them.

2 days in and I have to say, so far so good. I even took some time to appreciate when the kids were screaming and misbehaving. Being in the moment allowed me to realize that I will not get to hear these sounds much longer as the kids are growing older with each passing moment. Amidst the chaos, tears filled my eyes.

Please accept this blog as my virtual hug to you.

 

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