Unloading the Burden

Ugh. It’s been so long since I wrote a post I almost forgot my password.

Hello friends. Been awhile.

I spent a lot of time in the past wondering (and being pissed about) the fact that some of my biggest mentors never seemed to get “real”. You know, sharing their deep dark angers or depressions and then sharing how they got out of them. I mean, I wanted to know. How do you get out? Don’t they have those moments? Don’t they just want to throw down and rumble? Yeah, that metaphor probably doesn’t work for me, but whatever. I said it.

Generally these thoughts come in the midst of my own breakdowns. I want direction. I want someone to say, this is how you maneuver through life. Steps 1, 2, 3. Easy peasy. Only, it doesn’t really work that way. Like, ever. Then I think, but that is the mentor I want to be. I want to share my deepest darkest. I want to share how I maneuver through life. I want to help others through those times.

But, I can’t be that mentor; if that type even exists. I can’t share my deepest darkest because they are mine. They are mine alone to maneuver and yours are very different. I see that now. I also see that the best mentor I can be is the one who shares after I have survived the breakdown. I see that I would have never listened to my favorite mentors if they bitched and whined throughout their breakdowns about how unfair life is. They are my favorites because they lift me up always with their words and ultimately that is the mentor that I want to be for others. So, unfortunately for my hubby and friends they are burdened with my pessimistic view of life. They are the ones that listen and let me rant knowing that the words I am saying are in no way a reflection of who I am. They accept and absorb my darkness allowing me to reveal my own light again.

This is where I come to you and say, you can do it. Darkness gets heavy. It can weigh you down, but find your outlet, be it friends, journal writing, meditating, praying, and use it. Unload that burden knowing that you are never alone and as long as you are alive you have a purpose. Now, go out and find it.

Please accept this blog as my virtual hug to you.

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4 thoughts on “Unloading the Burden

  1. Sometimes, my darling daughter, it is all of the above: friends, journal writing, meditating and praying all in the same day, week, month, year. I found journal writing to be my best “friend”. I knew that I could go back and read it anytime and it would always put a new perspective on where I was and how far I had come. You are a wonderful human being and I am very proud to be your Mom. Love you!!! {{{HUGS}}}

  2. What you say here is so true. Our mentors wouldn’t be the same if we saw them being weak. We wouldn’t be as inspiring if we showed our weakness to those who look up to them. I love this post, Mel. xxxxx

  3. You are so brave, Melinda. I hear that about journaling and friends and meditating. Just left a luncheon with a friend who lost her 11 year old daughter over 20 years ago. Although she had a very deep place to come out of, she is one of the most giving and compassionate person I have ever had the chance to know….
    How one comes back from that type of loss is unbelievable to me……

    Take care and love to you..
    Chris

  4. You think maybe our darkest moments when we feel most alone is possibly the most fertile for growth? Heartfelt compassion and hope come best from those who’ve been there. You are a great teacher and holder of sacred space for others to discover their courage and strength. Love your musings.

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